


Buy Shyyyo Lotion Today!

by Altruistic_Computer



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: And Barriss is mentioned, And there's some random guy who shouts 'cut', But he's not important, Commercials, Crack, Gen, Graphic Depictions of Hand Lotion, it exists because we were talking about whether lightsabers would damage your hands, like once, this makes no sense, which is a long story itself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:54:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26677792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Altruistic_Computer/pseuds/Altruistic_Computer
Summary: Anakin and Ahsoka end up in a commercial for hand lotion.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20
Collections: SWFF Cursed Content





	Buy Shyyyo Lotion Today!

“Come on ‘Soka, it isn’t all that bad, you know this is good for the Republic and all,” Anakin half-spoke, half-pleaded as Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

“Really Skyguy? I’ve only been your Padawan for a month, and already you’re dragging me on this stupid ‘mission’,” she sighed.

“You know the Chancellor insisted. For publicity! Look, I know it may be humiliating…”

“Humiliating? Barriss already says that we’re not ‘serious’ enough, what will she think now, when she sees me in a commercial for kriffing hand moisturiser?” She rolled her eyes again and turned to walk off.

He put his hand on her shoulder before she could walk away and she turned around sharply, whipping her lekku over her shoulders.

“Fine,” she muttered. “I’ve given up on resisting. You’ve won this one Skyguy. Let’s go pour stuff over our hands.”

After spending what had been a painfully long hour preparing to film, they were finally ready. They both wore traditional, formal Jedi robes and stood uncomfortably, unable to go anywhere. The irritating background noises began.

“Fighting for the Republic can be hard work. It’s tiring, sometimes dangerous but, worst of all, lightsabers can cause terrible wear on your hands – look!” Ahsoka gestured at the fake sores on her hands.

“And so, when this happened to my Padawan, Ahsoka Tano over here, I recommended Shyyyo lotion. It’s a moisturiser designed to cure sores and friction burns, whether they are caused by a lightsaber, a blaster or just from carrying around your shopping bags!” Anakin passed the bottle to her as he spoke dramatically.

She rubbed the stuff on her hands. “Shyyyo lotion is now made with real kolto and bachani extract!” “It has been sponsoring the Republic for a whole year now!” Anakin’s stilted enthusiasm was one second away from making Ahsoka burst out laughing.

“Shyyyo, for a brand you can trust!” One second, just one, then she could laugh.

“Shyyyo – brilliant solutions for the most common problems!”

“Buy Shyyyo lotion today to have hands as soft as Porg feathers!” She closed her mouth and looked right into the camera.

“Cut!” Ahsoka and Anakin collapsed laughing.

“We’re never going to be taken seriously again, are we?” He looked at the ground, his face red.

“No!” Ahsoka laughed.


End file.
